Before The Dawn
A Prologue

1 Before the dawn, I ponder, walk, jog, and run, while aloud I talk. I want to be down on my knees, but can't because of despair's fees. As I focus to move seems key, In Agony I pray, I plea. forgiveness from my God to see. 2 But alas, am I Satan's son? Am I a son of perdition? I knew Christ was God's Son; but look what I have done. From a book I hear a Prophet, He speaks of repenting's banquet. But I don't feel hope's calm blanket. 3 The world now knows the truth morbid. I cannot still try to hide and in my fantasy world vie My arrest has stopped the vile lie. Two courts will decide my fate. My flesh to incarcerate, my soul to excommunicate.

4 All is lost to Satan's bondage. My job is gone, my wife has rage, contact with my kids forbidden. From my home I've been driven, Free on my own recognizance. An angry hard heart is evident A lawyer says, “give no comment.” 5 Weeks pass. I run with my strife movement helps me hang on to life, just existing, seeking sanity, I want to escape reality in pornographic fantasy. The facts are too full of hurting. Now the truth I must be facing, 6 Can I look through self pity to hurt of more than just family. Oh God, what have I done? Is there a slight hopeful zone? Change does not seem possible. My Higher Power is vengeful surely He can't love me still. * note Rove = To wander through or over

7 But alas miracles do rove.* His Spirit engulfs me in Love God's Love is overwhelming "Jesus loves you," it is saying God still loves the prodigal. Soft tears of joy fall magical. There is a chance of forgiveness 8 Can hate someday turn into love? Feelings with tears rise above My miracle is forgiveness, forgiving others can harness beginnings to forgiving myself I can't yet have enough belief; Christ's healing process begins 9 The Savior's atoning miracle has let me find hope's oracle. It's only a small beginning. this moment I'll be rememb'ring; the miracle of feeling God's love, a sinner touched by God's glove, My Lord teaches feelings with love. The future struggle and it's fright See a glimmer of hope's light.